Tapeworthy

Sunday, July 08, 2007

Big Brother Trifecta - First Midnight Gone

This is a little late but QTA posted his first commentary on Big Brother After Dark, the live feed that happens every night on Showtime Too at midnight (and runs for three hours).

Dear Readers,I, QTA, your loyal and intrepid Showtime Too subscriber, have sat through the first night of Big Brother After Dark, and I have learned many things that I just know you are dying to discover... It is day 6 in the house and...

#1. Three hours of unedited footage is VERY tough to sit through on any regular basis... as the first hour is mind-numbingly boring. Lots and lots of idle chit-chat. Watching Big Brother After Dark is the true test of how big a voyeur you really are.

#2. Tattoo count... HomoJoeJoe (small Chinese character on right shoulder), Creepy Daddy Dick (lots), Eric (sun on right shoulder), Jabba the Daniele (stars on her hip bones), Nick/ He-Man (right upper-arm half-sleeve)

#3. Smokers - HomoJoeJoe and Creepy Daddy Dick

#4. People are calling Daniele Jabba the Hut... which brings tears to my eyes because girl is so very very very skinny.... very skinny.

#5. Creepy Daddy Dick is far too fixated on his daughter and her sexuality and Nick's desire to be with her and people watching "her tits bouncing".... ewwwwwwww. He is also over-playing the game. He is not even eligible to be nominated and he is acting like a frightened puppy. He knows he is a future target (near future), but over-playing is not going to stop the inevitable.

#6. HomoJoeJoe's nipples are, in fact, as large as pepperoni slices... freakishly large. He is also much more delicate and fragile that he first appeared. He is still in love with Dustin, and I think HomoJoeJoe has very little chance of beating Dustin to the final. Dustin is a far more strategic player than HomoJoeJoe.

#7. Zach is also over-playing his hand too early. He came charging out of the gate acting like the big "master player." This, Zach, makes you a very BIG target. I don't expect him to hang in there past the mid-point.

#8. Kail (Mother Fartoosuperior) has a laugh that could cause America's collective heads to explode a la Scanners.

#9. Jen is no Janelle! In fact, she is so stupid that she sat there trying to work the television remote for 5 minutes... including taking out the batteries and putting them back in 3X. She doesn't contribute anything interesting to any conversation... Vacant... Void... Valueless...

#10. Eric, "America's Player," talks WAY too much... he never shuts up! He is like that nervous new kid at the slumber party who really wants everyone to like him so much that he ends up driving them all away. Hot nipple rings though. We will see how long he lasts.

#11. They are already eating "slop."

#12. The real "players," so far, are Amber, Dustin, Jameka, Nick, and Daniele... Yes, I said Danielle. She doesn't say a lot, yet, but she is watching EVERYTHING and EVERYONE... and she talked Nick into letting her paint his fingernails hot pink! Football player hottie Nick!

#13. Nick (He-Man) is really hotter than any of us might imagine. I think he is hiding some of his hotness for fear of destroying us all with its power. The abs... dear GOD... the abs... the smile.. the arms... le sigh... I really don't go for big muscle boys either.. but WOW!

#13 1/2. Nick has given another guy a blow job before.... Here is a clip [via duckyxdale]



Nudity in this episode.... none :(I will recap the After Dark as often as I can (it is 3 hours long and it airs everyday) this will most likely be a once or twice a week thing.

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